


Crack Shots

by LittleGamerLass666



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-20
Updated: 2020-10-27
Packaged: 2021-03-04 02:40:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 1,367
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24816232
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LittleGamerLass666/pseuds/LittleGamerLass666
Comments: 2
Kudos: 2





	1. Fight God

I flopped onto the familiar couch in the flat. Sherlock was staring into space and John was MIA. Probably with Marry. I just stared at the male and got an idea to keep myself entertained.

"I once got so shit faced, I called my mom and asked her to bail me out of church." He had no reaction. I smiled a bit and continued rambling into the silent air. Soon, I just began quoting movies and Vines. "Calling people Daddy is gross." I huffed. Though, he wasn't listening, I was just having a laugh. A few minutes turn into a few hours.

"One day I'll fight God." I sighed.

"I can't help with that, yet." Sherlock muttered back. I laughed.

"Same, bitch." I let my giggles die before I shot up and looked at the male, who hadn't moved an inch. "Yet!?" I asked, now on edge. "Wait, what do you mean!?" I asked, but he just got up and grabbed his coat and scarf. I got up after him, still in a shocked daze. "Sherlock, wait." I was honestly worried. "What to you mean yet?" I kept asking, though he only left. "SHERLOCK, DO YOU WANNA FIGHT GOD!?" I yelled after him just as the door shut. I stared at the door before shaking my head and going back to the couch. Now I'm worried. Very worried.


	2. 21 Pussy Cats

I watched as the tall male and his companion walked into the little dinner I invited them to. I knew there wasn't a case today and decided they needed a small break and I told Sherlock it was an experiment. John has no actual idea of my plan and neither did Sherlock. They walked to my booth as Elvis played over the jukebox and they settled in.

"So, what's this experiment?" Sherlock asked. John looked around, now even more confused.

"Just wait." I smiled back and sipped at my hot cocoa. They began to wait and once Hound Dog ended, What's New Pussy Cat began to play. "The experiment has begun, watch the people around us." I smiled and though he was confused, he watched. Once the first one ended and the second What's New began to play, Sherlock caught on.

"How many?" He asked.

"21." Was my only answer. He began to observe as John got his order. I looked around as well and goon we were at 5. A father with 3 kids got up and slapped the table.

"God damn it!" Was his only outburst as he threw down money and took his kids away. I nearly snickered and soon the 7th What's New had ended and It's Not Unusual began to play and some people actually burst into tears of joy and relief. Sherlock seemed most interested and once the song faded, silence filled the air, until

♪♫♪ WHAT'S NEW PUSSY CAT ♪♫♪

I watched as those same people who cried in joy, now cried in agony and everyone lost their shit. The staff just kept working and let it go, but soon after 11, they unplugged the jukebox and I slapped down money for my drink and got up with Sherlock as John scrambled after us.

"What was that?" John asked.

"An experiment, John, do keep up." Sherlock huffed and I just giggled to myself as the cries of joy and agony rang in my head. Soon I burst into laughter and I let my eyes cloud with tears of pure joy.

"It was so beautiful!" I laughed. "The dad who stormed out? Brilliant! Oh. The genuine tears of joy, believing that song to be other and their cries of agony as it played again? Oh, that was bliss."

"Interesting experiment." Was all Sherlock was able to mutter.


	3. Kink Shaming

It was a relaxing day as Jim bitched about this or that. Things that bothered him and shit that I didn't find too important. I can never tell you how we got there, but we got onto the topics of kinks.

"Calling people daddy is gross." I huffed, though I was joking... Jim didn't need to know that.

"Stop kink shaming me." Jim whined. I grinned, the flame in my eyes making him pause.

"Kink shaming is my kink." He paused to stare at me in pure fear before he screamed in panic. I just laughed as he ran out of air and choked, leading into a cough.

"Is it really?" He asked when he calmed down. I gave him a wink.

"You'll have to wait and see, now won't you 'daddy'?" He froze with a look of 'ew no' on his face.


	4. Fuck Me Jerry

I glared at Sherlock with a fury. His cold gaze holding my own burning one with not even a flinch. Tensions were high and John looked ready to run.

"I want you to fuck me, Sherlock!" He jolted and John began leaving.

"What?" The taller male asked.

"FUCK ME!" I barked again.


	5. Harmonica

I stared into those blue eyes of ration and order. I swallowed thickly as Jim's gaze stayed locked on me from the side. The air was thick. Almost felt like it was hugging every part of me too tight. I slowly raised my hand and set the object in the middle of the table and pulled away. There it was, a shinny metal harmonica. Sherlock's eyes flickered to it as did Moriarty's.

"What is that?" Sherlock asked, his tone cold.

"You play this and you get a hundred million dollars." I paused for a brief moment.

"But." Sherlock stated. I bit my lower lip lightly before I opened my mouth.

"But a hundred million people will die." Jim slid over the table, stealing the harmonica before ecstatically inhaling and exhaling.

"JIM/MORIARTY, NO!" Sherlock and I yelled at the same time, though I was laughing.


	6. Chapter 6

"What are we doing here?" John asked. The meeting room was small-ish and held him, me, and Greg. Greg was dressed for work as John and I were set for bed. My fuzzy SpongeBob pants kept me warm. My top a large t-shirt that said Keep Calm And with a picture of Snorlax sleeping at the bottom. It's 3:23 am. Too early.

"No bloody idea." The silver fox huffed.

"I'm gonna miss my shows at this rate." I muttered. There was slight annoyance in all our voices, but we continued to wait. The wood block of a door opened and in walked Sherlock, the door closing just behind him.

"Sorry I'm late. I was doing something." The words fell from his lips as the sound of storming footsteps echoes into the room. Sherlock took his place at the foot of the table as the stomping grew louder and the door burst open. I covered my mouth to prevent a laugh from spilling. The usually well done, high-brow Mycroft was dirtied, his suit ripped at the shoulder, bruised and looked like he rolled on the sidewalk.

"Nice of you to join us, Mycroft." John said, his amusement dripping from his words. The eldest brother panted a few times, trying to collect himself.

"He pushed me down the bloody stairs." My croft walked in further, but Sherlock didn't bother to look over.

"Pushed is such a strong word." Sherlock started. "I prefer to call it, giving you a little nudge." He turned and gave that look. You know the one. The one that says he's holding back, but his eyes had that glint of evil.

"I'll giv you a little nudge when I shove my foot up your arse!" Mycroft barked.

"Hey!" Sherlock barked back. "Watch your language in front of the lady." I let out an unattractive snort and finally broke down into laughter as the brothers bickered back and forth.

"I'm going home." Greg muttered and began to head out. John said nothing as he continued to watch the free show.

"I am the smart one!" Mycroft was losing it.

"Here we go, always had to be the favorite." I honest to God fell from my chair as I began to cry. This was beautiful.

"You have any snacks?" John asked. I shook my head.

"Mother tolerated you!" Sherlock yelled.

"She loved me more and you know it!"

"I refuse to believe your slander about mother."

"Sherlock!"


End file.
